Think I'll roast some hot dogs over the flame of my BURNOUT

Upon arriving back from DC on Saturday night, I have been living at the library. Yes literally. I pitched a tent and lit the trashcan on fire and roasted some hot dogs. Well, minus the tent. and the trashcan. and the fire. and the library. Okay so I ate a lot of hot dogs this week and that's pretty much it. BUT SERIOUSLY. I CANt STUDY ANYMORE. have you ever seen me use this many caps??? I have been studying and writing papers nonstop since Sunday. Somethin's gotta give. I can't live LIKE this. This is not living at all. It sure as HAAALLEEEE does not help that two teachers stood me up at their office hours. They both had to "step out unavoidably." Suuurreeeeeyadid. aholes. I'm just kidding, I am sure they were telling the truth. They're still aholes. You know why? Because they were not considering number one... aka... ME. What they should have done was come to my apartment and serve me the test answers on a silver platter. WORSTTEACHERSEVER. Pretty sure I have carpul tunnel. At the very least I will probably get it later in life because of all the typing I have done this week. I feel like I am gonna go to the Doc when I am 50. They'll be like
"welll ma'am... did you do...a lot of...typing? When you were 20?"
" DAMNIT."
" And did you eat a lot of hot dogs? "
"Wait a minute how'd you know that??"
"Well I've read your blog daily for 30 years. And memorized it. And hung it all over my bedroom, using your words as wallpaper. Sweet sweet wallpaper words. yeaass. i carry an extra stack in my pocket here see. sometimes when i feel blue i just kind of smell it. and rub it on my arm pits."

clearly my response to stress is creating fictional creepsters. i do this a lot actually. usually in conversations with other people. its even more awkward then than it is now.
but weirdos are always HILARIOUSESSPECIALLYTHEGAYSZYEAHMAKEFUNOFPEOPLE THATARENTLIKEYOUEVERYBODY

so let this be a lesson to you all. show up to yourGODAMNDOFFICEHOURS.